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Do I have to honor my parents when...



Bible Study Posted  June 18, 2000

This week's scripture:  
Ephesians 6:1-3  Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor your father and mother" - which is the first commandment with a promise- "that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth."

 This week's study is about obeying and honoring our parents. But what if our parent is asking us to do something wrong? What if a parent doesn't deserve honor?

 Parents, don't read this Bible study. O.K. I knew you would anyway. There are a lot of parents that won't like some of this study. That's because they think it will make them look bad. But I want the kids to learn from your mistakes and sins, even if you won't admit you were wrong.

 Hey kids, here's why we are having this study. According to the statistics, over 70% of the kids reading this do not live with their blood father and mother in an intact home. That's depressing. There are a lot of reasons. Sometimes (but not often) it is because a parent died. There is no sin involved with that. But if you live with only one parent, or a step-parent, or foster parents, then someone didn't obey God's laws. If everyone obeyed God's laws on dating and marriage, there wouldn't be divorces or kids living in single parent homes. The only reason one person could divorce is if the other one sinned. So if you live in that situation, someone messed up, and it wasn't you (the kid). There are tons of Bible verses on dating and marriage, but most of you are old enough to worry about that yet. This Bible study is for the kids in these "broken" homes. If you live in an intact family, cool, you are lucky. Read this so you can understand to help most of your friends.

Do I always have to obey my parents? Most of the time, yes. I wish all of you had parents who made a strong effort to raise you in a Godly home. That doesn't always happen. Even if you have good parents, sometimes they will ask you to do something that you shouldn't. Has your mom ever asked you to tell someone on the phone that she wasn't home? Has your dad ever asked you to tell someone he is sick when he isn't?
 If your parents ask you to do something that is a sin (like lying, stealing, cheating) then it won't be a sin to disobey them. You might get punished by your parents, but not God. (Special note: Most parents are pretty cool and will understand if you politely ask them not to tell you to do something wrong. If you live in a house where a parent will abuse you, do what you need to do to be safe. I hope that if you are in that situation you will seek help from someone in authority. Thanks "K" for pointing out that some adults are abusive.) And don't try to find a scripture somewhere that says it's a sin to cut grass or wash dishes, it's not there. I've looked!
 For kids that don't live with both parents it is even tougher. Sometimes adults will use their kids to get at an ex-spouse. Your dad might ask a lot of questions about your mother. Your mother might ask you to tell your dad something that isn't true. It isn't fair, but you are being used as an information tool. If this is happening to you, then ask your parents (politely, always) to talk to each other. Tell them that when you get to be with them you want to be involved with them.

 What if my dad doesn't deserve honor? Sometimes they don't! Adults do stupid things sometimes. If your dad (or mom) left the family to marry someone else, I wouldn't want to give them any respect! Even if they don't deserve it, you have to honor your parents. Even if you think you hate them, you should honor and love them. You don't have to act like them. But they are your parents, and God used them to bring you into this world. If they don't deserve honor, then pray for them. Ask God to give them the wisdom to see their errors, and to give you the wisdom not to make the same mistakes your parents did.
 Whatever you do, don't think of your parents as a god.  Everyone makes mistakes. Everyone sins. If you know your parents messed up, promise yourself and God that you won't make the same mistakes.

 If my parents are divorced, does that mean they are going to hell? Like I said earlier, if you live in a divorce or single parent home, someone sinned. But guess what? Everyone has sinned. Including me. Including your pastor. Including you! Any sin that brought on divorce can be forgiven. The sins that bring on divorce are not any worse than stealing, coveting, or anything else. Hopefully if your parents have sinned, they have asked God to forgive them. The bad thing is that parents who do the sins that cause divorce not only mess up their lives, but the lives of their kids, too.

So,  you should obey and honor your parents. It will make things a lot better around the house. No matter how much they have messed up, I have never met a mom or dad that didn't love their kids.  And God even promises that if you honor your mom and dad, he will give you a long life!

This week's prayer:
Dear Father,
 Thank you for being the all powerful loving God. In everything that happens, I want your will to be done. Please help my parents make good decisions, for themselves and our family. Help me to be a better kid. Help me to obey and honor my parents.
 Thank you for being our healer, provider, comforter, and God.
 Amen.


Story posted June 18, 2000

Father's Day

  On Father's Day, Fred Red is talking to Elder Everett. He is very excited. Joey is walking by and here's how excited Fred Red is. He stops by to see what's happening.
 "Hello, human Joey!" Fred Red said with a smile.
 Joey replied, "Hi Fred Red. What are you so excited about?"
 "It's Father's Day! I am going to radio my Father on our home planet."
 Elder Everett had a puzzled look on his face. "What did you say about home plants?"
 "Turn up your hearing aid, Elder. I said 'HOME PLANET'" shouted Fred Red.
"Do you miss your Dad, Fred Red?" asked Joey.
 Fred answered, "Yes, very much."
 "Do you think he misses you?" asked Joey.
 "Of course. But he has my brothers and sisters to comfort him."
 "How many brothers and sisters do you have?" asked Elder Everett.
 Fred Red answered, " I have 42 brothers and 29 sisters. A total of 71."
 Elder Everett looked funny. "I need to turn up my hearing aid, I thought he said 71."
 Joey jumped in, "WOW! That's a lot! How could your parents have 71 kids?"
 Fred Red explained, "Easy. There are usually 12 to 15 of us in a litter."
 "Wow. I wish I had that many brothers and sisters." said Joey.
 "How about you, human Joey. What are you going to do with your father on Father's Day?"
 "Nothing. My parents are divorced. I haven't seen my Dad in about a year."
 "That's very sad. Have you tried to call him?" asked Elder Everett.
 Joey answers, "Yeah, but he stays busy. Then he just wants to tell me bad stuff about my Mom. He asks questions and stuff. And Mom says not to tell him stuff. I can't decide whether it's wrong to lie to them, or not honor them. The Bible says I have to honor them and tell the truth, too."
 "Fred Red starts thinking, "That is tough. Iíll look in my Bible and see if I can find an answer for you. Bye human Joey! Bye human Elder Everett!"
Elder Everett and Joey say goodbye to Fred Red. Fred Red goes home and digs out his Bible. He looks through it and writes down some verses to see if he can help Joey with his problem.

 Fred Red took his little red alien body over to Joey's house. He found Joey working on his bike.
 " Hello, human Joey! What are you doing?"
 "Hello Fred Red. I'm greasing my bike chain. Did you talk to your Dad yet?"
 "Yes, human Joey. He is doing well. But he is tired because the new litter is staying up all night, and with 13 screaming babies it is hard to sleep."
 " I guess so."
 "I have been looking into your problem, human Joey."
 "Oh yeah? What did you find?" asked Joey.
 "You were right. The Bible says we have to honor our Mother and Father." answered Fred Red.
 "I knew that."
 "Yes, but I looked up honor in the human English dictionary. It says that is to show respect. It does not say anything about obeying every command."
 Joey knew that, too. Joey said, "Yeah but the Bible also says 'Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right'."
 "Yes, human Joey. But remember the part that says 'In the Lord?'"
 "Yeah."
 Fred Red answered, "You have to obey them, but not if what they are telling you to do would break God's laws. So if your Father asks you to lie to your Mother, or the other way around, you do not have to lie."
 Joey had never thought about that. "I guess your right! I never thought about it that way. I wish parents wouldn't divorce."
 Fred Red replied, "Me too, human Joey. I guess they are human. At least you know you don't want to put your children through that."
 Joey said, "That's right. For now I will obey my parents and honor them. When I get older I'm going to try to obey God's laws, and when I get married, it will be forever! Thanks Fred Red."
 "You're welcome, human Joey."

Fred Red stayed at Joey's house and helped him fix his bike.

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Search for these words!
CHILDREN
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Answers for word game posted June 18, 2000

H Z V Z Z J H X T S D S D G F
F C H I L D R E N K O O I A U
G V Y F U G T A E P R F H D H
U P V D X E I Y M O F L J C W
K H R H R S P P D Q N N L U Q
T A L O E O O N N E P K H F P
E X F H M Q L M A B K D W H Y
B V P U W I P O M Q F X U P O
O E W N S O S Y M Q P H R S P
D D N T Z S S E O U R L E M U
W O W G T Z J K C I L I X V T
T G K I F D P O G U K T M O Y
Y E B O X K D H U R J T L Y Q
N U O R X M T U B F P E S P T
R N N K X V X F R E D R E D Y

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